Invitation to Interruption

I like to be in control of my schedule and have to work hard to not be resentful when something (or someone) invades that territory. I view interruptions as invasive intruders on my already involved activities.

So I was especially impressed by a friend who shared how she had handled a recent interruption disguised as a blessing.  Darlene explained how she discovered she was locked out of her house on a very busy day when she was preparing for family to come in for dinner.  There were so many things to do and now she had no idea how she was going to get it all done in time.  While I could totally sympathize with her frustration, her story continued with an unexpected twist.  Instead of stewing, she thought "OK, I wonder what God has to say to me in this. He knows I have a lot to do!"  So she sat down on her back steps and looked out over their farm.  She noticed a little rabbit scampering across the way and other beauties of nature.  She took a deep breath being thankful of her blessings when she realized she had her cell phone with her all this time.  Instead though of calling her husband Cecil or someone else for help, she felt impressed to call her brother with whom she had not visited in quite a while.  They had a wonderful visit.  Feeling especially light-hearted after the phone call, she decided to try the door again.  Amazingly the door opened and she was able to go in and ready the house for her company.  The extraordinary element in this story was Darlene's brother passed away the next week.  That annoying interruption led to a beautiful visit with her brother that would probably would have not happened if she had not been "locked"out of her house.

Her story brought me to tears mainly because I was so touched by her sensitivity to be led by the Spirit to stop and listen but also because my reactions to interruptions had been so the opposite.  I would have used my cell phone to call for help or to complain about "how would I ever get everything done now".  I probably would have even whined about the rabbit (well maybe not...I like rabbits but when I get in those moods even bunnies bail!)

Darlene accepted the invitation to relax and enjoy the Lord and He gave her a very unexpected and precious time with her brother.  I don't have to wonder if I have missed blessings because of my unwillingness to savor moments when things don't go my way.  I know I have but Darlene has helped me see the grace and beauty of accepting annoyances and interruptions with open eyes and an open heart.  Don't miss the moments!

Another First Day!

As I walk through the halls this morning on this brand new school year, I observe the students unpacking their supplies and backpacks.  Unsharpened pencils waiting to work, unbroken crayons waiting to create, and blank paper and notebooks ready to be filled - the scene is set and ready for production.

It brings back a memory, a not so good memory of my very first day of school ever - first grade.  (Kindergarten in those ancient years were only for the "privileged" kids!)  It was a horrible day really.  I was the oldest of the children so it was a big deal for me to leave home.  I was totally not ready for it!  I had NEVER been away from my parents even at church and I was not happy about this school idea.  It was a bad setup from the start.  I had to ride the school bus which in itself was a huge fear for a scared little five year old but I was made to sit on the front seat and the bus driver (Mr. Allsup who drove me all 12 years!!) kept his watchful eye on me.  I didn't have my mother at the door taking pictures (no such thing as first day pictures in my day!) but was left to wander the vast playground to find a friendly face.  It was finally time to head inside and while I was excited to buy my school supplies (new school supply smell should be a scent) I was not sure I was ready for what came next.  I don't remember a lot of what the teacher said but I do remember she said "Let's have a race to see who can put their supplies away the fastest!"  As everyone else it seemed rushed to complete the task, my paper sack from the office supply store burst open and every crayon, every pencil, everything fell to the floor.  Of course the students began laughing as hot, lonely tears fell down my cheeks.  I wanted to go home.

I was placed in the blue bird reading group (not the top one) and I struggled with drawing the slanted lines first to the left and then to the right.  I really don't remember holding a pencil before that time but I am sure I did.  I remember thinking I can't do this! what am I doing here anyway?

I don't really remember getting home that day but I know I ran down road from the bus stop to my house.  Everyone was happy to see me and I can't even imagine the relief and joy they saw on my face.  

Somehow I made it through that year and then the rest of elementary, junior high and high school.  Four years of college followed and today I begin my 37th year as an educator.  Another first day!  I just know there are some students here today who feel just like I felt my first day.  Scared, unsure of their abilities, wondering what is happening at home, and ready for the dismissal bell to ring.  I can so relate.  

I want to be on the lookout for those kids  who look like they are scared to death, who don't like school food and not sure if they know if they have a friend.  I am so lucky - I can be that friend.  Did I just hear crayons hit the floor?

Beyond the Barn

It is years past its glory days but those days were the most precious to me.  Now the old barn must be torn down and along with it go some of my dearest childhood memories.

The barn was a mysterious, lovely place to all the children who came to it.  Our friends found it fascinating and we were proud to show them our hideouts, our secret meeting places and the wonderful treasures inside.  It was a dark place so you weren’t sure what lay too far back in its corners but yet it was comforting at the same time.  It was a home to the sweet smelling feed barrels, horse saddles and bridles, and old garden equipment, dusty and rusty from lack of use. 

The barn’s tin roof was a refuge from the sun and was musically alive when rain would fall.  The hayloft was filled with rectangular bales of hay that my sisters and I loved to sit upon and hold our secret country club meetings. We would open the loft door and look over the barnyard area as we repeated our pledges and made plans for the future.  It seemed huge and vast and we felt like we had a handle on the world.  The connections my sisters and I made then will last always.

The cows and horses would eat below the loft and as we brushed them we had dreams of grandeur.  It was a privilege to be the one who pushed the hay from the loft onto the waiting animals below.  Chickens (while hated by us girls) would strut in and out of the barn and seemed to delight in flying from a perch and scaring us.  Kittens, puppies and even rabbits all had a home at one time in the old sanctuary.

Years have passed by and the animals have all gone.  Mom has been unable to care for the barn or make any repairs and each passing year has taken its toll on the old barn.  The tin has mostly blown away from the roof, the wood has become weak and rotted, and the color has all but faded away. 

I pay a tribute to the old place.  I have never found a solace quite like the one I had in the loft and barn and I think my sisters feel the same. We dreamt of the future and thought things would go on forever just as they were then.  While those adventures were years ago, the tears of loss flow easily and mournfully today.   When we lose a childhood landmark, it brings a sense of reality and reckoning that we are changing too.  Maybe that’s the hardest part.