Truly Thankful

It’s Tuesday and we are still reeling from the emotions and events from this past Sunday.  I want to be thankful and thoughtful in this post because all of it was a big deal to us.  

We have been blessed in a million ways face to face and by Facebook comments -- we love it all but now I want to share a personal comment about and to Bill first.  I wanted to say this on Sunday but it would have become blubbering babble.  

‘One of my favorite authors said “True ministry is not something we do but is the overflow of an abiding life with God.”  True ministry is getting to know the bank tellers, the postal workers, the McDonald’s employees, the pool store employees, visiting the widows, helping people in need, going to the furtherest parts of the world, and going across the alley to help and talk to a neighbor.  Those things don’t happen because it’s in your job description but an overflow of an abiding life with God.  Driving broken down buses, dealing with air conditioners that only work in winter, sleeping in cabins with noisy boys, working with budgets that always seem to fall short are not always noticeable but notable.  Going to hospitals in times of crisis, going to a home when tragedy strikes, bearing with a family in a time of unexplainable sickness is not fueled by duty but by love of Christ.  I’m so proud of you and the life of a minister that you have led behind the scenes.  You are the same ornery guy at home that you are in the office.  You tease and love, you laugh and cry, you rejoice and are heart-broken sometimes all in the same day.  You will miss being a pastor because it wasn’t a job but a calling.  While there have been mountains and valleys, you had at your heart to share the gospel by loving the least of these.  

You have always given me the freedom to serve Christ in my own abilities and callings and not do something just because I was the pastor’s wife.  You also never once in public or private told our girls they were to do something or more specifically not to do something just because they were the preacher’s kids.  

I know your ministry is not over because if it’s an overflow of your abiding life in God it can’t be.  From Fairview’s farewell of an okra pie in the face (youth ministers get to do the craziest things), to the lives we led at Ft. Worth, Drummond, Allen, Bristow, and Burkburnett we have left friends and memories trailing us all around. Just as Joshua told the Israelites ‘you have not gone this way before’ we are also in unfamiliar territory.   We will go forward with our trust in God and in Him alone to lead us.”

Now…we thank you Burkburnett FBC-Anita, Cecilia, Fran and crew-all who helped with the setup and planning of Sunday’s reception-it was beautiful, memorable and perfect; Mindy for your sweet recognition of my work in children’s ministry-I am deeply humbled; the choir’s special presentation at the service and reception was awe-inspiring -it was so wonderful we thought our hearts would burst; friends and family who traveled from all over to celebrate and to launch retirement-you surprised us and honored us.  We appreciate you and are humbled by your time to be with us.  Thank you church family and friends for the love offering.  Your sweet kind words in cards and notes are rich treasures for us.  As one said we left two footprints on her heart, please know our hearts are a busy thoroughfare of your footprints on our hearts.  

We covet your prayers as you have our promise to continue to pray for FBC Burkburnett in this time of transition.  We thank you for all you have done for us and our family.  As Bill said in his resignation you were with us through so many major life changes and circumstances and we are forever thankful of how you ministered to us.

I read this passage this morning that reminded me not only of Burkburnett FBC but everywhere we have served.  “I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the growth.  So then neither the one who plants nor the one who waters is anything, but only God who give the growth.” 1 Corinthians 3:6-7

It’s all about God, it’s all for God; but only God.  

Walk and W(h)ine

The other day while on my daily (well almost daily) walk I passed by an elementary school where the children were leaving the school building headed to the playground walking in a perfectly straight line.  I thought of what an interesting story that would may so I spoke into my phone to send me a message that said “walk in line”.  I went on about my walk but when I got home and saw my message it said “walk and wine”.  

Now there’s several ways to go with that one but I’ll take a path close to home.  My walk that morning actually was a walk and “whine”.  That morning just had not gotten off to a good start and the most frustrating things kept happening.  I know retired people should just be happy and relaxed all the time but I just haven’t gotten there yet.  I had whined about this and whined about that but still had decided to go on a walk.  

Passing by that school and seeing the kids, I did remember how many times I had had playground “duty” and felt a little bit missing out but…it passed pretty quickly.  I did continue to glance at the kids playing together and noticed the teachers who were “on duty” when I saw at the kids coming out to play walking very dutifully in a line.  Walking in line pretty much ends at elementary school but I smiled at this making my whine day a little less important.

Walking in line shows patience, respect, and obedience (so says a former teacher).  We always told the students, walking in line helps us get them safely and quickly from one place to the next but unless you were the line leader, it really didn’t make much sense to them.  There was always a lot more action at the end of the line but I wouldn’t know about that.  

So how does any of this relate?  Micah 6:8 says “He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?”  We are given some simple basic instructions to get us from one place (earth) to another (heaven).  The instructions are for our good and to help us arrive safely home.  We sometimes get distracted and may hold up the line or there are times the teacher has to stop and correct us before we can move forward.  

God had sent me a little correction that day with a bit of humor.  My voice activated commands are not always accurate and are sometimes totally off base but God’s Word is always accurate and true.  My walk ended with a lot less whine and more in line with truth.  

Decisions-Life Giving or Draining

It has been stated we make about 35,000 decisions a day.  While most are decided without too much thought many take days to determine. With a lot of decisions to make, I found a podcast about making decisions—of course!  

The advice today was against pro/con lists when deciding but rather think about these two questions ‘is this life giving or life draining?’  I thought okay I think that will work…but what I realized is what was life giving to me was the same thing that was life draining.

One of my “roles” (mom, daughter, grandmother, teacher are all in that list) that I have written little about is being a pastor’s wife.  Bill and I have been married 43 years and he has been in ministry not only that long but was doing youth and music ministry before we were married. Yet for my role -that of a pastor’s wife- it has been a 43 year old career.  

Bill announced yesterday his retirement from his 17 year pastorate here at Burkburnett FBC.  His role and mine will be changed and we both have thought about that a lot.  Hence, my afore mentioned podcast.  Decisions that have been made and yet to be made will require thoughtful attention.  

As I thought about what is or has been life giving or life draining I truly say (without trying to offend anyone) being a pastor’s wife is both.  There have been times that I have been overwhelmed with support and love and concern for family simply by being the pastor’s wife.  I know there have been times I have been prayed for simply because of being the pastor’s wife.  Life giving. Along with those life giving actions, sometimes running parallel, are life draining situations.  Church business meetings, disagreements, and discouragements from the most unlikely places simply drain the life out of you.   I have thought I would write a book on the ‘secret life of a pastor’s wife’ knowing the word secret would be intriguing but spoiler alert..it’s not that secret.  There are no behind the scene vices or secret life different from the one that is seen from me on Sunday.  Not perfection by any means but I try to be who I am wherever I am. There is a loneliness to being a pastor’s wife that only another pastor’s wife can understand.  The life giving part is from those friends who look past the pulpit and see needs of friendship and laughs.  The life draining part comes from criticism and judgement directed to your husband in such a public way.  

No matter what I do I know there is life after being a pastor’s wife and I will use those same questions to help me make decisions about what to do.  While my role in church life will change, I will still seek to honor God through that role.  There have been tears through decisions made in the last several months.  Tears missing the dear relationships we have made in Burkburnett not only through our church but in the community and also some tears of confusion.

While this is a much more melancholy post, I guess it’s where I am.  There is an excitement for new things (life giving) and worry (life draining) about what will happen next.  This is my verse for July - one that is always timely.

“God has not given us a spirit of fear but one of love, power, and sound judgment.”  2 Timothy 1:7 

PS - The podcast I mentioned is “The Next Right Thing” by Emily P. Freeman.  She is wise beyond her years!

Book Review for "What Am I Feeling?" by Dr. Josh and Christi Straub

I am a part of a group with B & H Publishing that allows me the privilege of review new books.  This month the book was "What Am I Feeling?" by Dr. Josh and Christi Straub.  I was excited to see a children's book that I could use at church or other settings to share with children about their feelings.  As a school counselor for several years, I was always on the lookout for books on feelings as I discovered there were many times children just couldn't identify what they were feeling and most importantly how to react to their feelings appropriately.  This book is beautifully done and has a pullout feelings chart in the back of the book.  I look forward to using this with children especially in a Christian setting.

Because I Said So!

Raise your hand if you have ever said to your child ‘because I said so!”  Even though we strive to keep that phrase out of our parenting arsenal, we default to it all the time or at least more than we want to admit.  Why?  Probably because we have no brain power to come up with anything else.

Actually sometimes it is the best thing we can say to our child - because at the heart of the issue we really have their best in mind and they should do what we say simply because we said so.  

In Luke 5:1-11, Jesus begins calling His apostles.  He was pressed in by the crowd so much so He was backed up to the edge of the water.  He saw two empty boats there because the fisherman were off on the shore cleaning their nets.  He got into one of the boats (happened to be Peter’s-still called Simon at this time) and Jesus asked him (Peter) to go out into the lake a ways so He could teach the crowds from his boat.  Peter did as requested.  

After He had finished speaking, Jesus told Peter to go out a little farther into deep water and let down the nets for a catch.  Now Peter and James and John (v.10) had been fishing all night.  They were cleaning their nets.  They were finished.  It had been a complete bust of a fishing expedition—they had caught nothing all night.  Yet Peter here says, “But if You say so…I’ll let down the nets.”

This phrase caught my attention—just because You say so.  How many times has God said something and like a questioning child we keep saying ‘why?’  

• Do not be anxious about anything but in every situation by prayer and petition with thanksgiving present your requests to God; and the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.  Philippians 4:6-7

• Trust in the LORD with all thine heart and lean not unto your own understanding.  In all thy ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your paths.  Prov. 3:5-6

• God is not a man that He might lie or a son of man that He might change His mind.  Does He speak and not act, or promise and not fulfill?  Numbers 23:19

These are just a few examples of God’s Word and why we can trust Him.  He has our best in mind.  We either don’t need to know the reason why or possibly we are not at a point where we could handle the reason.  When we answer our children ‘because I said so’ remember as a child of God, we should do the same.  

By the way, after the men let down their nets, they caught so many fish their nets were breaking.  They were able to fill both boats so full they began to sink.  Who knows what might happen just because He said so!

The Ruthless Enemy

A few years ago Bill got a bird feeder to set outside our kitchen window. He thought it would be fun to watch birds that might come to our neighborhood.  Well --fast forward to today and we now have a bird feeder village feeding a variety of birds!  Gold finches seem especially drawn to us at this time of year.  They seem to appreciate the extra seeds and peanut butter Bill provides for them.  

This New Year morning was no different as the birds begin a little after sunrise pecking at the seeds.  We were watching them filling every perch when suddenly —they disappeared.  Bill commented something must have scared them but just as quickly he noticed the reason for their departure.  Less than ten yards away in our neighbor’s bushes, a huge hawk had settled in for a quick breakfast treat.  Bill headed out the door sure to scare it away and show these birds are protected.  The hawk flew reluctantly away..but not too far away.  

This situation brought to my mind a familiar passage.  2 Peter 5:8 says”  Be sober-minded, be alert.  Your adversary the devil is prowling around like a roaring lion, looking for anyone he can devour.”  We are like the finches, going about our business, having fun, filling our desires with good things and mostly unaware of the enemy who comes dangerously close. If we are not careful, he will certainly devour us.  

Several things popped out about this description.  First the devil is an adversary.  That means he is not for us.  He seeks to scatter, not gather or unite.  Second he is prowling.  To prowl is ‘move around restlessly and stealthily, especially in search of, or as if, in search of prey.’  That is completely different than casually walking by or happening upon.  The enemy knows exactly where to look and who to look for.  That hawk knew the feeders which we had placed for good was also a place to find his prey.  Third, he is looking for anyone he can devour.  It doesn’t matter if it is a pastor or a parishioner, man or woman, gold finch or sparrow-he doesn’t care.  He wants prey! 

How do we fight this kind of enemy?  While Bill chased the hawk away this time, it will probably come back.  We could stop feeding the birds but they would miss the feast.  So what works?  I think the answer is in verse 8:  “Be sober minded , be alert.” 

R. C. Sproul says “To be sober-minded is to treat truth seriously and to have a healthy doubt as to our own understanding of truth.”  In other words know the Word.  You are no match for the enemy but God’s Word shuts him up and chases him away.  

The hawk’s goal is to scatter and to scare but his ultimate goal is to destroy.  Our enemy is no different.  Start the new year with a goal to make God’s Word a priority.  It’s the only sure fire defense against a ruthless enemy!